Look Who's Talking

  

"You'll never guess what comes after 3...
4! I know, crazy right?"





"Take a whiff of my new aftershave."



"What the heck just happened?"

"Listen bro, I love you and all but don't do that again. You almost messed up my 'do."



"It ain't easy lookin' this good."





"Oh yea? Well then GET OFF MY BUMBO!!!"



 And in matters of a pinch more importance than make-believe banter between a toddler and a 2 month old, articles like this one is one of the many reasons why I'm a huge fan of Jenn.

Have a stupendous weekend erryone!

Oh Happy Day

 

1. Excited aunt. Even more excited infant.
2. Three generations of Asian persuasion.
3. Let's play Button, Button, Who's Got the Camera Remote Button?
4. My church is better than yours because we get donuts for communion.

Our Sweet P got baptized this past Sunday. If our church looks like an elementary school cafeteria...that's because it is. It's actually a multi-purpose room and it's temporary while our church gets built. Not sure why I felt the need to explain that. I guess I didn't want anyone to think we worshipped hairnet wearing lunch ladies. Although I do remember the cafeteria pizza from my school days being heavenly delicious, plastic-y cheese and all.

Morning Shenanigans

Playing innocent when I caught her playing with her brother's "missing" dinosaurs.




 

She was enjoying my rendition of "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" until...








I sneezed.



Photo shoot OVER.



Thighs

Do you not just want to smooch this thick baby goodness?

Power of the Boob Juice





Sassy pants tights demanded a quickie photo shoot before we left for her 2 month wellness check this morning. Weighing in at 13.5 lbs and measuring just shy of 24 inches, she made mama proud. And of course, she wouldn't be my daughter if her head circumference wasn't in the upper 70th percentile.

She was born on a Saturday and had already lost 11 oz by the following Monday. Although it's quite normal for babies to lose up to 10% of their birth weight, that's usually spread out over the first week. Since P had lost so much in just a couple of days, our pediatrician was concerned that she would lose even more before gaining again so I was given strict orders to nurse every 1-2 hours even if it meant having to wake her up. (First thought? Shoot me now. Second? Need to find a new pediatrician.) As demanding as those first couple weeks were, it was worth it. Thanks to Dr. Sudha's tough love and Paulie, the most wonderful LC in all the land, P is growing like the best of 'em. These suckers lended a helping hand too.

Happy 2 months Sweet P.

Finally Warming Up

We've seen a drastic improvement in sibling relations in our household since this unfortunate incident a few weeks back. I stepped away from (a tightly strapped to the changing pad) sweet P for a moment to restock her table-side diaper inventory when, upon my return, I was greeted with this sweet sight:

No, he's not giving her a noogie. Don't let the look on his face and her flailing limbs fool you. He's actually brushing her mohawk very carefully into place while saying, "Hi princess. Here you go pretty Penny."

Can I please just freeze time so they stay like this forever? Ok maybe fast forward until H is potty trained and then freeze?

My POV

On a more serious note, this rapping priest (wha??? I know) pretty much covers what I think about this video that's been all over FB lately.

Mommy's Girl, Daddy's Boy



Now we're even.

Day in a nutshell

From up to down:

1. As of late I'm a milk factory trying to keep up with this demanding customer.
2. That chair used to be somewhat upright. Not no mo. I didn't want to break the news that he surpassed the max weight limit for it a year ago. Could you imagine having to be the flight attendant who has to tell a passenger they need two seats? I would quit on the spot.
3. Quasi-healthy lunch to make me feel better about the baked ziti with meatballs I had for dinner last night. The following recipe involves precise measurements so be sure to be exact.
• Throw some chopped chicken breasts, apples, celery, red onions and parsley into a big bowl.
• In a separate not-so-big bowl, whisk together equal parts sour cream and red wine vinegar, a smidgen of mayo (NOT Miracle Whip Unless you like disgusting in a jar.) and a pinch each of salt & pepper.
• Pour dressing over chicken mixture and toss to combine.
• Stir in chopped walnuts and grapes.
• Eat it with some greens, make a sandwich out of it or just eat it out of the bowl you made it in (utensils optional). I won't judge.

The milkman, perhaps?

Before I completely beat the side-by-side-picture-post dead horse (oops too late), I came across these two snapshots. 

Believe it or not, these babes came from the same set of parents. They also weighed the exact same at birth, down to the ounce. They both like to pass the time by loudly grunting then flatulating at all hours of the day. Apparently Mylicon is no match for my kimchi-flavored breast milk.

And the worst mother of the year award goes to...

Me.

The other day, after spending a thrilling morning at Sprouts and Costco (my life is FILLED with glamour, don't hate), we come home and my Sweet P is loudly expressing her hunger. I had switched up my usual milk-stained nursing tank and yoga pants for a sweater, jeans and an actual bra for our outing so I set my crying P down on the bed while I changed back into uniform. As I was washing my hands I heard H come into the room asking, "Where's my baby sister?" then her cries started to sound muffled. H often tries to cover her with a blanket to keep her warm but overshoots and ends up covering a part of her face so I wasn't TOO concerned about his intentions.

Turns out I should've been.

I quickly dried my hands and turned the corner just in time to see my 3 week old infant

fall

off

the

bed

onto 2 pillows and a blanket that were miraculously stacked perfectly to break her fall. Fortunately we have a low platform bed so that coupled with the landing pad, she fell no more than 5 or so inches but I was hysterical nonetheless. She didn't cry any harder than she had been before the fall and stopped as soon as I picked her up so my hysteria calmed down a smidgen but didn't completely go away until I stripped her down and inspected every inch of her pink body to make sure she was still perfect.

Now in H's defense, I didn't actually SEE him push her off the bed but it's either that or our little girl is a baby prodigy and already rolling over. Since the latter is highly unlikely, all contact between H and Sweet P will be under extremely close supervision. Or I need to stop putting her down anywhere other than her bassinet even if it's just for a second.

Lesson learned.

And to think I thought he was adjusting well.



P.S. If child protective services calls me, I'll have a very small group of suspects to narrow down. 33 as of today to be more precise so don't get any ideas. Nobody likes a tattle tale.

Arrival of Sweet P

I think my feelings would be best expressed by the following montage of pictures along with a (attempted) quick recap of what went down.

Disclaimer: I may have gone a little overboard with the paranthetic statements in this post. My bad.

December 2, 2011

8:45 pm: I was sitting on the edge of our bed, brushing my teeth, convinced I would be the only woman in history to go overdue with her second baby when I stood up and felt a warm trickle down my legs. I waddled to the toilet before getting too excited. The last thing I wanted was to go to the hospital for the nurse to tell me I wasn't in labor and that I just needed a good pair of Depends. After making sure it was indeed my water, I yelled to Jorts to initiate Operation Baby Bean. Once our bags were packed and my mom arrived to stay home with our sleeping H, we were on our way!

10:00-midnight: Checked into the hospital, got poked with what felt like a million needles (One of which hit "a juicy vein" according to the nurse. I about fainted when I saw her cleaning up a puddle of my blood and almost slapped her for shoving the plastic part of the IV unneccessarily far into my skin. Proof can be seen in the 1st pic above.), laid uncomfortably for what felt like an eternity waiting anxiously for the contractions to start while my water took its sweet time coming out trickle by trickle. Grossest. Feeling. Ever.

December 3, 2011 (due date)

1:00 am: I was 3 cm and the contractions started to get more intense so I asked for an epidural in my best Shirley Temple voice only to be shot down by the witch nurse who told me the OB wanted to wait for them to be closer together. I demanded for the OB to come tell me that to my face (in my head) and mumbled something about how I got my epidural at 3 cm with my first baby (outloud). I also learned that Jorts is a mutant with regenerative abilities because I'm fairly certain I bit his head off after making a comment in front of the nurse about how I set the record for earliest request for an epidural. His new head won't be making that mistake ever again.

2 am: The anesthesiologist who bore a striking resemblence to Ken Jeong came in on his gleaming white stallion and administered the glorious goods.

2:00-4:30: Bliss.

4:30: I started to feel slight discomfort again from the contractions and immediately pressed the little blue button, terrified I was going to have a repeat of my first labor experience. (I didn't take advantage of the option to re-up and my epidural ran out in the middle of pushing. Horrifying, I know.) The button didn't do jack so I told the nurse that I needed more drugs. She chortled (to my befuddlement as my request was not a joke in the slightest) and checked me to see if the more intense contractions were a sign that it was time to push. To my surprise I was at 10 and the OB was on her way!

5:04: After 2 pushes (a stark contrast to the 4 hours of pushing with H), our pretty P was born weighing the exact same as her big brother and 20 in. long.

I know it's taken me forever and a day to get this birth story up but I promise I'll be back soon for an update on the adventures since homecoming along with a post for this honor.

No Hands in the Shape of a Heart

Because that ish is played out.
So we used tinted chapstick instead.

Our little family of 3 + 1 pending got some pretty pictures taken by the oh-so-talented Niomee Baker the other weekend. I obsessively checked the mail several times once a day until the CD came. I lurrrved how H's 8 month pictures turned out last year and she definitely didn't disappoint this time around either. Here are a few of my favs.

T Minus 6-9 Weeks

Top: Gap, Shorts: Target, Scarf: Loft, Belt: BR, Boots: Nordstroms, Ring: Brush Bar




 

Or 31 weeks.

Feeling pretty good other than my feet resembling the Easter Island heads by the end of the day, hence my oatmeal-colored foot attire. It may be October and the rest of the country gets to look all snazzy and cozy in their fall fashion, but it's still reaching 100+ here in death valley Arizona so I usually get a couple raised eyebrows when I go out in public rocking my wool-knit preggo boots. Until their eyes move up to my belly. Then they just give a "oh you poor thing, those must be the only shoes that fit you" smile.

This commercial made me think if those pot-bellied hamsters can bust out those kind of moves then this preggo needs to waddle her asian butt to the nearest hip hop class A-sap. I sure do miss my college dancing days but I think I'll wait until my center of gravity returns to normal before attempting any popping and/or locking.

Opposites and Lessons Learned

During a rare cuddle session this morning:

H, pointing to my armpit: "Biiig pitty!"
Then points to the inside of my elbow: "Little pitty."

My child is a genius.

On a couple other notes, I'm relieved to report that I passed my glucose test with flying colors. After another embarrasing encounter at today's checkup, I have decided that my weigh-in uniform will consist of a tank, leggings, flip flops and nothing more.

7th 7 Quick Takes

~~1~~

During this week's trip to the OB, I was ever-so-politely told that I had gained an incredible amount of weight since my last checkup...but that it was ok because my average overall weight gain was right on track. Um, then was it REALLY necessary to bring it up doc?? More importantly, how come nobody said anything when I had gained double the weight by this time when I was preggo with H? Guess I'll have to ease up on my nightly dozen Krispy Kremes.

~~2~~

My weight was quickly pushed to the backburner when I was told Baby Bean was measuring 2 weeks bigger than expected.

"Your first baby weighed HOW much? You know they only get bigger after the first hee hee!"

Thanks ultrasound tech lady. She then proceeded to tell me how her first started out at a dainty 7 lbs then worked her way up to 10 lbs with her 4th baby.

Great.

I can't wait to give birth to a 15 pounder.

~~3~~

Best of all, we got to see this sweet little face. I was on team girl up until I saw these 3D images. I thought I saw something between the legs (even though I tried really hard not to even look) but it could've just been the umbilical cord. Now I'm thoroughly confused.



Is it just me or do these features look masculine?



~~4~~

Got to third-wheel it, as usual, with these bosom buddies over the holiday weekend. Wouldn't want it any other way.





~~5~~

H's new obsession: fort building.

~~6~~

Celebrated my homie Danielle's birthday along with some other lovely ladies at this local Italian eatery. The cioppino was scrumptious. I pretty much licked the plate clean. And by pretty much, I mean I did. No shame in my game.



We moonlight as cheerleaders.



~~7~~

I came across the recipe for Sprinkles strawberry cupcakes and gave it a whirl. Jorts and I have a small, um, problem with Sprinkles cupcakes. At $4.25 a pop, we will soon have to start selling valuables to help support our habit so I figured I need to find an alternative. Though it's not as pretty as the original and the recipe needs a little tweaking, it came out pretty darn good.




I almost ate the plate too.